


we fell out of love on a tuesday

by orphan_account



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Cheating, Dean Winchester Bears the Mark of Cain, Demon Dean Winchester, Heavy Angst, M/M, Mark of Cain (Supernatural), Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-20
Updated: 2019-11-20
Packaged: 2021-02-13 14:43:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21495973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 6
Kudos: 24





	we fell out of love on a tuesday

it fucking sucked, what was going on between them. he noticed, and he knew that meant cas had, too. the way they didn’t hold hands anymore, the way he would lay at one end of the bed, as far away from cas as he could get. the way he’d turn his head just slightly, so when cas would try to kiss him, he would miss his lips.

the bunker was tense, now. an awkward atmosphere surrounded them, wherever they went. sam noticed, after awhile, how the two of them had changed.

it was like one day, they were in love. one day, he couldn’t stop looking at the angel who had chosen _him _, who fell for _him _. and the next day, it was like he was a complete stranger, and any feelings he had for the angel, were gone.

it was like a flame being diminished, quick and without warning. cas had tried, and bless his heart, he tried so hard. so hard to get him back. but dean couldn’t, he couldn’t. because when he looked at cas, he felt nothing. not the love, the adoration, the awe he felt before.

he saw how it affected cas. he saw his mood change, saw how heartbreak changed cas. but when he tried, dean couldn’t find it in himself to care. and when cas figured that out, he saw the pain explode in cas’ eyes.

sometimes he’ll sit there, in the kitchen, alone, with only a bottle of beer and his memories to keep him company. cas goes on hunts with sam now, they can’t be alone together, because cas can’t be near him without tears filling his eyes.

when it’s times like this, dean reminisces. and then, only then, he’ll remember how he used to feel. how he felt with cas when he still _felt _something _for _cas. he remembers the pure, unfiltered joy that filled his heart the first time cas had held his hand, and he remembers how his heart surged in his chest the first time he heard cas call him his boyfriend. he remembers when they first made love, and cas had cried out his name, and he had kissed him so gently. he remembers cradling cas in his arms that night, and he remembers how much love he poured into the kiss that he pressed on cas’ forehead when the angel rolled over on the bed and snuggled into his chest.

but now? now, no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t replicate those emotions. he tried. he did. when they had sex, (_ they didn’t make love anymore, because dean didn’t have any love left to give) _he would try to make it the same as before, fueled by the same passion as before, but they barely ever made it halfway, before cas was pushing at dean’s chest and shaking his head, wiping tears from his eyes. dean would watch, as cas fled what used to be their room, and even then, he couldn’t find a single reason that he should follow.

and when he went to the bar, alone, and came home with a blondie with dark brown eyes, the direct opposite of cas, and fucked her on _their _bed, the only thing he felt was the pure lust of running his hands down a woman’s body, fondling a woman’s breasts, and kissing a woman’s mouth.

and when cas walked in, words on the tip of his tongue, and saw dean on top of the girl, he only smirked at cas and shrugged, and smiled when the angel ran off.

it was a destructive cycle, what they were doing, but dean couldn’t make himself care, and cas couldn’t make himself stop.


End file.
